I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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