good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
