i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
