Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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