Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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