He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
