So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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