she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
