I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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