I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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