I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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