There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
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