she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
