Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
