I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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