Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Randomize
