well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize