On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
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