Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
