I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
