THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
