So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
We're too hungover to prance.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Randomize
