chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
