I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize