she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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