I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
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I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
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She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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