The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
