he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
