Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize