Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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