something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
