Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize