suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
