Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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