Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize