Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
