I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
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