she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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