omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Randomize
