If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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