Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
