He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
