Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
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