Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Randomize