sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Randomize