i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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