Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
