well I can't set my house on fire every night
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize
