Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
