If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it penis luge time yet?
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
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